Thinking about committing to someone special? Read this guide for twenty questions to ask before taking the relationship plunge. Find out if he's really worth your time and energy!
Ladies, committing to a relationship with someone special is an important decision, so don't be so quick to settle down with someone until you know they're a real match. Life is too short to commit to a man if you two don't have the same alignment when it comes to desires in life.
So, ask the tough questions and make sure your values line up with his before putting a label on it. If the relationship is gonna work long-term, dive into the conversations that really matter - long-term plans, how he handles conflict and any potential deal breakers. Working out these details can save you time and energy in the long run and ensure your relationship will be healthy for both of you.
To help you along the way, here are twenty questions you might want to consider asking your man before committing.
1. What is your definition of love?
It is important to know what your potential partner's definition of love is - this will help you to understand how he views a relationship, and what values he holds for it.
2. What qualities do you think are important in a partner?
Knowing what qualities are important to him in a partner will help you determine whether or not you match up with those values, and if there are possible areas of conflict that may come up in the future.
3. Are you looking for something serious or casual?
Finding out if the man you've been seeing wants something serious or casual will ensure that both of you are on the same page in terms of commitment levels and expectations from one another. If you're looking for a marriage potential and he's looking for a casual partner, no need in wasting important months or years of your life with someone who isn't on the same page.
4. How do you handle conflict in relationships?
Understanding how he handles conflict in relationships is essential for any successful union, as it can reveal potential issues before they become unmanageable difficulties. Look for his maturity in resolving conflict and ability to compromise and listen.
5. What do you look for in friendship?
Asking about his expectations for friendship will inform you about his ability to be emotionally supportive and invested in the relationship, as well as providing insight into what he looks for in others outside of a romantic context.
6. Have you ever been in love before?
Knowing whether or not your potential partner has ever been in love before can give you an indication of their capacity for emotional vulnerability, as well as their ability to form meaningful connections with others over time. And by others, we mean you girl.
7. How do you feel about taking vacations together?
This question is important because it can give insight into whether or not spending quality time with each other is something that both of you value. It can also show how compatible your ideas for vacations are and determine if you're on the same page when it comes to spending money and planning trips. Asking this question can be a great way to get to know each other better and ensure that both of you are looking forward to making memories with each other.
8. What expectations of me would you have as your partner?
Talking about his expectations from a partner can ensure that the both of you are on the same page when it comes to your roles in the relationship and each other's needs and meeting those needs without resentment or misunderstanding later down the line.
9. Are there any topics that would be off-limits for us to discuss together?
What topics would be off limits for conversation can be difficult but necessary to discuss - touching upon any taboo subjects beforehand can prevent hurt feelings later on due to having different viewpoints. And if you believe that there shouldn't be any topics off-limits, its important to know if he has any to determine whether you want to commit.
10. How often would we communicate with each other if we were in a committed relationship?
Communication frequency should be discussed early on and definitely before you commit to someone. Understanding how often he prefers communication between each other during times when things may get busy or difficult helps maintain a healthy relationship dynamic overall and can help to prevent conflict in the future.
11. What would your plans be for the future if we were committed to each other?
Discussing plans for the future if committed is also important - talking through potential paths forward can provide clarity into both of your perspectives regarding long-term goals which could level-set expectations about the future. It's important to make sure you both have common hopes and desires prior to committing fully to a relationship.
12. How much autonomy and independence should I expect when it comes to making decisions in our relationship?
Establishing autonomy versus independence when making decisions together speaks volumes about trust between partners – finding out where his opinions lie on such matters can open up dialogue around this issue immediately rather than waiting until issues arise over such topics.
13. Would religion or spirituality be an important part of our relationship if we were committed to each other?
The role religion or spirituality may play within a committed relationship should not be overlooked – bringing up this topic allows an understanding between you and him which could either bridge gaps or deepen one depending upon pre-existing spiritual ideologies.
14. Would family visits or gatherings be something that we would ever do together if we were committed to each other?
Family visits or gatherings might also need clarification between you two. Avoiding misunderstandings over potential problems looking back at impromptu visits or gatherings with family members is wise.
15. What was his relationship with his parents like growing up? How is it now (if they are still living)?
Relationships with parents can have a profound effect on a person's ability to form meaningful relationships throughout their life. A man's past relationships with his parents influences how he communicates, interacts, and understands others. It is important to explore this connection with someone before committing to them, in order to get an understanding of how they may interact in your relationship.
16. In times of crisis, how will communication be handled between us so as not to add fuel to the fire instead of solving the issue at hand together peacefully and efficiently?
In times of crisis communication should remain stable – knowing that both parties understand that communication is key lets each feel at ease knowing they will receive support throughout those moments.
17. What boundaries must be set so as not to infringe on one another's personal lives yet still remain close as partners in life?
Boundaries must always exist within close relationships – respecting personal space yet staying connected allows pairs the opportunity at more meaningful moments without feeling overwhelmed by closeness.
18. What level of physical intimacy is comfortable to him?
Before committing to a relationship, it is important to consider the level of physical intimacy that you both are comfortable with. Does he prefer public displays of affection such as kissing and holding hands, or would he rather keep things private at home? What type of physical intimacy and frequency would he want and does that fit your needs and desires?
19. How do thoughts around children fit into his life?
Talking about children is an important question for couples to discuss before committing to a relationship. This helps ensure that both parties are on the same page, avoiding any potential conflict down the road or wasted time.
20. Is he a spender or saver or both when it comes to his money?
It's important to know whether a man is a spender or saver when it comes to his money before you commit to him. Knowing this can tell you a lot about the kind of person he is and whether the two of you are financially compatible for the long-term. Spenders have an easy time making purchases on a whim and often live in the moment, while savers may be more prudent with their funds and be looking towards a future plan. By understanding your partner's relationship towards money, you will gain valuable insight into how they handle responsibility and respond to various situations in life.
Decisions, Decisions
While everyone's relationship is unique and different, there are certain important topics to discuss with a potential partner before making a commitment. From finding out more about his goals and values, to understanding his communication style and financial habits, asking the right questions can help ensure that you're both on the same page. So take some time to think deeply about what matters most to you in a relationship, and don't be afraid to ask meaningful questions before you take thenext step. Good luck!